by Coach Donna Fleetwood
I NEVER ate Kale. That dark green vegetable brought up the memory of mushy, slimy cooked spinach I was supposed to eat as a child. Then one day my friend told me that kale salad was really good. I ordered one in a restaurant and found that the secret to a great kale salad is massaging the leaves to make it tender with the infusion of lemon juice and oil. I gave up my conclusion that I didn’t like kale and would never eat it. Now I love it.
As coaches, we find some people we coach living limited lives because they are in a box of their own making called “conclusions”. These conclusions can negatively impact becoming a successful Real Estate agent, pursuing spiritual development, being a loving family member, seeking adventure, or becoming financially successful. The conclusion “I won’t eat kale” is a cousin to “I can’t call 10 people”.
Maybe you came to coaching to be taught how to be a successful Real Estate agent. Maybe you came because you wanted a quick fix for wherever the soft spots are in your business. We teach repeatable proven systems and have years of agent numbers tracking as evidence. If everyone followed the system without question, there would be a lot of successful agents. However, each person will work a system differently because each person is different. Most arguments are with ourselves. That’s where individualized coaching comes in.
Life is an inside job. If you were learning to swim, you would want some help getting in the water with a teacher and coach to help you with fears, and resistance. There would be small steps until you understood the process and well as your inner world of endless thoughts. The mind that tells you to quit, turn back, or that you can do it yourself would start to become quiet. That’s the priceless journey and the silver lining of coaching…the self-awareness that comes from the nurturing engagement with a coach.
Teachers impart knowledge. Coaching focuses on questions to help people discover their own answers You could say that teachers push and coaches pull. Every session has elements of both.
So, what would you like to be coached on? It starts with the question and requires the sometimes difficult work of looking inside for the answer. Start with a thought that is "I can't" or "I won't".